Cheer Up Emmis

To Whom it May Concern:

Please cheer up. You are far too kewl to be so down in the dumps. You will find a husband to assist you in the reproduction of young emmises (:-o <==B), however, you will only be able to find that joker in Shitcago (the land of opportunity and husbands). Shitcago is where the lonely come to find happiness and sleep on aerobeds in the living room / kithchen / dining room of their friends' tiny ass apartments. Emmis, you are not lonely b/c of you, you are lonely b/c you are so amazing that none of those giant douches in Shitboston know what to do w/ a wonderful young lady such as yourself. You are so genteel and ladylike. Don't fret young Emmis, dont fret. You are so awes, so very awes. We will hang out for all the days at Mars-sh and Franksh wedding. We will drink beers, talk fantasy baseball, have the barkeep at the hotel prepare us Miami Vices with only the finest liquors and bacardi frozen mixers. We can even bring decks of cards and cash to the reception and get a game of blackjack at our table. TOO MANY!!!!!!!!

Onto the good stuff: (1) STA is in 7th which means that the world is finally begining to revolve on its normal axis. (2) My insides are rotten, don't ask. I'm going to try this stuff though to try and alleviate the problem: http://www.colonblow.com/testimonials.htm (please read the 1st testimonial). (3) Lil' Bush is hallario. I love it when Babs Bush bangs lil' Cheney.

I've got nothing more to publish. I am jobless, broke and fat and am simply getting fatter by sitting on the couch typing. Poor guy. Don't worry though. I have begun taking steps to remedy this. I got fitted for a brazzier at Victoria's Secret today. I am a 44DD and i'm not bragging.