What Am I Up To?

Well loyal readers(r) I am still lounging in middle america. Yesterday I took a road trip to Kansas City. Who knew that part of KC was in Kansas and the other part was in Missouri? I certainly might have known this a few years ago but I definetely forgot and was mystified when I was told this astounding information. What a revelation. Anyways, onto things not involving a city named Kansas City. It appears as though Saddam Heussein will be executed tommorow. Hey Saddam, maybe i'll send you a bottle of bubbly, a bucket of ice and a card and have it say: tough break, get drunk on me, use the ice to ice down your marbles, yours Z. In your face Saddam! In yo face, in in yo face! I wish I could stand in front of you with my back towards you and kick dirt up onto your freshly pressed white shirt. Where does he get those? Anyways, onto topics other than Saddam. I watched the movie Mean Girls the other night, it was actually pretty good. Also, I watched Idlewild a few nights ago. It was solid if not spectacular. Those nephews from Outcast really know how to put together a nice broadway show-esque movie. Hmmmmmm what else, what else. Honestly, the blizz hasn't done too much lately and i'll tell you this, I am not complaining. Starting Jan 3rd I will be on lock down in my parent's attic / my dining room, which also serves as the living room, kitchen, forier and my closet. Heyo? Thats right readers(r) not Heyo. Not heyo at all.

Da Da, Da Duuuuuuuuuuuh It's Fantasy Weekend Update with your host Mikka Kiprusoff. Hello, yes yes Hello. Tis Massive, please, I give to you weekend update. I bring to you weekend update on, how do you say, fantasy sports. What is this fantasy sports? Please, I not know. I like. Team Crackle!, what is this Crackle!? Tis in two place. Como se dice Earl Jones? Give me apple tea! Earl Jones esta en place number 6. Tis a massive place. Tis truly. Snap!, how do you say, is dropping like rock and make trade with Pop! for all crap player. Ah yes, tis hockey time. Frozen Thumbs Arbuckle slash The Mighty Pubes, what is this slash and what is pubes. How do you say in Czech? Please give to me translation. Tis in place number 1. I like 1. I like. Tis it. I am done. Stay tuned for tommorow host: Quentin Richardson.

The blizz is now going to go eat wings, drink beers and watch college football. In everyone's face who is not doing this or something equally as fun. Please notice the name of the hotel chain sponsoring the Music City Bowl. That is Hilario.

It's Christmas time in Hollis Queens

Happy Hanukkah Everyone and for all of my Christian readers, Merry Christmas! Ho Ho Ho and a bottle of ru-um. Christmas is starting to grow on me. Not like some wierd growth but more like me liking it more. I got hooked up with amazing gifts. Someone really loves this guy even though he has a cut wiener. Zing! I'll be back to my regular posting schedule tommorow. I apologize for the lack of posts but I have been very busy lately. NOT! I have been busy lounging and getting even fatter. Cough, heyo!

Blizz E. is Travelling to Middle America

Well friend(s?) I am off. Where to you ask? The exact location you ask? I cannot divulge due to security measures that we here at Thumbs take to protect our writers. To tell you that I am going to Joplin, MO would violate protocol and could result in my dismissal from all things related to the opposable digit. So I will tell you that I am going to America's breadbasket. I am going to soak up all things Americana. I am going to shake hands with the daughters of farmers, act genuine and drive for countless hours without the slightest change in elevation or scenery. I will give a full report as interesting things occur. However, i'll be honest, I am probably going to spend the majority of my time inside Mrs. Thumb's parent's gigantic / awesome / my compound for the week / I never want to leave house. I only speak the truth on this blizz. Enough about my holiday plans. What are all the reader out there doing for Hannukah / Chanukkah / Christmas? Please feel free / you better post an answer of some sort in the comments section. Sorry for the threat but I feel as though I had to sink down to that level to get my readership (singular not plural) to leave us comments. How else do we know that we are doing a good job? I don't know either.

Ahhh, I went to the Beau Rivage tonight to meet my aunt (dont!) for dinner and a little gaming. I won $30 and was pleased with my results. Usually I blow it all b/c for some reason winnings don't seem real unless you take 1 step out of the casino. Then you are excited to have $30. However, when still inside the casino $30 is chump change and leaves you feeling like a FUDhead unless you win alot more. Maybe that's just me, NOT! Anyways, I had the babyback ribs, a baked sweet potato with a marshmallow-butter mixture (it was unique and amazing) and a wedge salad. Delish! My thumb was full.

Alright, i'm tired and need to get some rest before my long voyage tommorow. Wish me adieu and I hope to see all of you back here tommorow. Same Thumbs time, same thumbs place. Smell ya.

P.S. - Lebron James' newest color of his shoes come out on Dec 30th for all those who want to get them. They are the blue / orange ones.

Blizz Elliott Thumbs

Blizz E. for short. H H H H H cough cough couch H H H H Heyooooooooooooooooo! Alright meow here is what's new: (1) Hoff Con Crema graduated with a JD/MBA. Blizz E. is proud, very proud and I think all readers should be. Feel free to post comments congratulating Mrs. Thumbs on her achievements. Also, feel free to post other comments, any comments, any comments at all will do. (2) Gallatoire's, the ancient and supposubly amazing restaurant in New Orleans, really let down the entire Thumbs Staff (I took the staff out for their holiday party) by serving food that was average. We (The Thumbs Staff and Robert and Harriett Hoffercronopolous) did not think that a bowl full of crabmeat = great meal. (3) Frozen Thumbs Arbuckle (temporarily The Mighty P*bes) has regained 1st place in fantasy hockey. Lord have mercy it feels so good. In everyone elses face who is not in first place in their fantasy hockey league. Thats all for today. I only had 3 new things happen. My B. I'll try to have more things happen to me tommorow.

Now I bet everyone / every literally one wishes the recipe section was still up in this.

I am fat!

I'm going to be cereal with all of my readers, all 4 of you, I am really fat. I can barely see my junk when I take a shower b/c my luxurious stomach is in the way. Is that bad? NOT!, I was merely telling a little joke (pun intended). However, all I have done lately is eat and drink beers. My ass jiggles and that is on the real. Nobody likes jiggly ass, especially not the governing body here at Thumbs, Inc. They have fired an employee for the slightest jiggle in their buns. We run a tight ship around these parts. Speaking of jiggles, I had a camper at in my cabin at Camp Blue Star that was really fat and had huge 13 year old male kid kiddie boobs and I called him "Jiggles." His full name was Jiggles Greenberg. I drafted him on my athletics team just so we could all laugh for all the days. I know this was incredibly mean but being a former fat kid I felt as though I was allowed to partake in this type of behavior. However, i'm sure the authorities that be at Blue Star would feel differently if they knew that about 20 counselors were laughing at this kid running around and then nearly collapsing after running 10 feet due to exhaustion. So fat and pale. No big whoop. Who isn't?

Fantasy bball time. Honestly, there is nobody worth picking up right now unless you want to take a chance on David West returning really soon. I would only do this if you have an player on your team that really sucks and you have still been winning with that loser on board.

Update on Foamposites: WTF? I have no update b/c nobody knows when this shoe is coming out. Honestly, i'm pretty sure that this makes me a total wierdo but I have nightmares about everyone getting this shoe and then kicking me in the jimmy with it. Not really, but I can't stop thinking about them. I love them so much.

The recipe section of this blizz has not been a real crowd pleaser so it is now officially eliminated and a recipe will never be spoken of again on this bleezy. However, due to our love of comments, if a reader (I can now stop making jokes about only having 1 reader. NOTE: No I cannot really stop making jokes b/c the only way those other readers read my pride and joy is if I call them and tell them that it hurts my feelings that they dont read this blizz and b/c those jokes are the only mildly amusing thing that this blizz has going for it) posts a comment asking for a specific recipe (this will obviously never happen) the blizz will surely try to oblige a reader / reader.

Mkay...time to go tuck in the little graduate. She has a big day of wearing regalia, celebratory dinners and receiving 1 thousand hugs, high fives and finger snaps from the Thumbs Graduation Liasion.

What the Deuce?

Here are all the things that I hear / see and think to myself, what the deuce?

1) The Illinois Bar Exam requires a Dean Certification to prove that I graduated from law school. WTD?

2) The Hornets starting lineup currently consists of Chris Paul + the following clowns: Rasual Butler (who?), Marc Jackson (huh?), Desmond Mason (como se dice?) and Cedric Simmons (a sphincter says what?) WTD? Peja, where have yo gone? P.S. If someone asked you where Jannero Pargo played college bball what would you're answer be? There are only 2 possible choices: (1) he is from Brazil and didn't play college ball or (2) he obviously played at Florida A&M (FAMU for all of you scoring at home). Answer: He played at Arkansas? Close enough.

3) Xenaderm "it promotes healing" Cream costs $92. WTD?

4) Xenaderm "it really does promote healing" Cream could cost $292 b/c it is a miracle worker. I am no longer hideous. WTD?

5) I just sharted. brb. WTD?

6) Baron "Barone" Davis official shoes only sell for $26. WTD?

7) The OC is no longer available in its entirety on Fox.com. WTD?

8) I work as a sous chef (and that's being a little generous with the title). WTD?

9) Cingular Wireless slogan states that they have the fewest dropped calls. Uhhh, WTD?

Sorry for my briefs post but I have to go run some errands. I know what all of you / holding firm at 3 readers are thinking: What the crap do you actually have to do today? Well, I have to get cleaning supplies to clean my hizzle, groceries (meats, cheeses, wines w/ tannins, jammyness and cherry overtones and only the finest beers brewed in far off lands by monks, nuns or rabbis) and go pick up my enormous TV that I have left at a friend's house for over 1 1/2 years. I better get to it. I hope to see that all of you / you have been reading this blizz (blizzing is my passion) and the only way for me to know that all of you / you have been reading this blizzel is if you post in the comments section.

Hornets Game Tonight!!!!

Dear Friends,

I'm sorry for the brevity of this post but, alas, I must get ready for the New Orleans Hornets game tonight @ 8:30 CST. Finally they are back in their rightful home, The New Orleans Arena. I am so sick of those Oklahoma City yokels thinking that the Hornets are their team. I have news for all of you temporary Hornets fans: You all really suck and pee on your balls. It is now 6:27 CST and I am about to jump in the shower. After said shower I will tend to my wounds. I will cover them in the new dick cream that I got at Wallgreens today for a whopping $91.99. Is the dick cream industry in some sort of recession? Is this brand of dick cream in short supply? This ointment better heal those wounds with not even a trace of scarring. For all those interested it is known as Xenaderm in the world of scientists and pharmacists but in my world it is known as dick cream. Seeing how I am really immature, odds are that I would call any sort of topical, cream, ointment or paste dick cream. OK enough with all of that. Post dick cream application I will sit down on my favorite chair and a half, kick my feet up on the matching ottoman and drink a Chimay in the special gobblet that my 3 pack came with. I think i'm going to drink the blue tonight. After I drink the blue I will then proceed to drink the red and then I will hopefully be picked up in front of my building by the dude I am going to the game with. It was a pity invite, I dont really know that many people in Nizzleans anymore and my special lady friend has a legal profession final tommrow. We here at Thumbs, Co are extremely proud of her for taking the last final of her law / business school experience. She is smart. Hopefully she will not read this blizz and see what a jackass she is engaged to. Also we here at Thumbs would like to give a hearty thank you to one Davis Burks (made up name to protect this consumate professional) for hooking Thumbs, Inc up with our corporate season ticket plan. Thanks Davis Burks!

Fantasy note: Crackle! is losing 7-2 due to our squad being devestated by injuries so we had to pick up Bruce Bowen to play tonight. I then immediately dropped him and picked up Drew Gooden. Hopefully Bowen will hit 4 3's tonight and do little else. I hate that guy.

Alright, I gotta go. See everyone / 3 people tommorow. Ah, before I forget. Thank you "anonymous" for your post. I am glad to see that this blizz is not going unnoticed. Feel free to continue commenting. We encourage comments around here. If you have any other friends send them my way and be sure to brief them on our pro-comments policy.

Tis the Season

All those who say that it is better to give than receive are right. Seeing the look on someone's face when you get them a gift that they really love / pretend to love and then tell someone how the gift sucks when you walk out of the room is much more gratifying that receiving a gift that you really want (i.e. foamposites), NOT! I feel like I have been incorporating the "NOT!" joke into this blizz at an alarming rate. Reader(s?) what do you think? Please dont be shy. Go ahead and post your feelings in the comments section of this blizz. Back to the gift giving section of today's blizz: I am planning on getting gifts for the following people: Jennifer Q. Hoffermanstein, Dr. and Mrs. Maaaaaaaarsh V. Mill, Big M, Little Organ Vanessa Miller (I have been informed that she reads this blizz from time to time. I think this could mean that we here at B.D.L.T.A. have 2 readers. It's not everyday that a blizz doubles its readership in 1 day), the Hoffermansteinbergsky Family and certain readers (E. Rose Moustache) and friends that live in Cleveland and have shitty fantasy bball teams (Puddy Condomway). Please be advised that those are all aliases. What will I get all of these people you ask? I will tell you what I am thinking in the next paragraph.

Gift Wish List:

1) Something Engraved / Monogrammed (flask, bracelet, etc)

2) Socks and Undies (see the urban dictionary definition below)

Tighty Whiteys, otherwise commonly known as 'regular underpants', are general targets for wedgies and mervins, due to the pleasing effects of the elesticity, which results in a desireable snap and hopefully a tear.The number one bad bad place to wear tighty whiteys is a high school locker room. Your social life is almost assured over if you are changing with whitey tighteys while next to the varisty football team.Lastly, the number one comback not to use against the varsity football team once you have been found wearing whitey tighteys, would be anything relating to their jock straps. Whitey tighteys suck. Boxers are better.

3) A Lexus from the Lexus Holiday Event Commercials (December to Remember)

4) Homemade flavored Vodka in a festive / decorative bottle (Limoncello perhaps?)

5) A Gift Certificate to Harrah's Casino New Orleans

Thats all I can think of right now. Why is this so difficult? If only we could get everyone a pair of rare basketball shoes.

Fantasy News and Notes: When did the NHL allow players named Dwayne and Jerome into their league? I guess they are Canadians too if you know what i'm saying (catch my drift? wink wink). Fantasy bball sucks so I have nothing to say about dropping / adding players. Im not bitter about all of my guys getting hurt, NOT! P.S. Pick up Speedy Claxton.

Why does Blue Bell Ice cream always discontinue flavors that I love (Homemade Vanilla and Peaches)? Bring it back Blue Bell, bring it back. I've given in and tried your strawberry but it sucks.

Alright, this blizz is going nowhere fast today..... I'll post more later when I get past this case of blizzer's block that I have had today. My B Loyal Reader and Big M, Little Organ.

Jello?

I don't want to seem like one to complain but where are all my readers. This is Thumbs' 2nd calendar month of blizzing and we / I have 1 reader. Now we here in the office at 1800 Thumbs Blvd, Suite 690 are not complaining about this lack of subscribers (remember the subscription is paid for you by Thumbs, LLP and is free after mail in rebate), we are very happy to have the loyalest reader that one could ever wish for on board, but we would like to get a little more feedback. I'll be honest, we / me and the loyalest reader know that this blizz brings it like a true pro on a daily basis but we would like to tweak things every now and then so we need to get the message out: "Love that bloggin from Thu-umbs" (sung to the tune from Popeye's Fried Chicken / Mardi Gras Cheesecake / Crawfish Poppers). Alright, on to the good / bad stuff.

I'll be the first one to admit that my Earl Watson advice was flat wrong. The guy is a bum. He sucks. My B. Honestly though, he looks so good in that picture, NOT! Cereal though, pick up Anthony Parker, he is ranked 70th overrall and he is steady. Steady but not spectacular. Actually, only pick him up if you have someone that really sucks on your team. I've really got nothing else to say about fantasy. Crackle! is turning into an infirmary for extremely tall African Americans who happen to play basketball for a living. Ray Allen, Lamar Odom, J-Rich, Corey Maggette, T-Mac and Pau Gasol (he is black) are all hurt. WTF! I am going to drop in the standings like a deuce. I'm so mad! I'm not mad at any of my readers though.

Penny Foamposite update: I am calling this shoe store in Georgetown, DC tommorow to get the official release date. Don't tell anyone b/c this is a rare shoe and will be released in limited amounts and I absolutely must get 2 per. The guy who I spoke to at said store told me to call on Wed and he would give me the exact date. Campout anyone (in front of Sports Plus on Canal St in NOLA)? I'll bring the graham. Then we will take the graham, put the chocolate on the graham and then roast the mallow. Blow out the flame on the flaming mallow. Then...put the mallow in b/w the 2 graham crackers and pull your twig (that you used to shield your hands from the flame of the campfire) out and enjoy. That scene was brought to you by the cast of "The Sandlot." I think we all remember the scene where Hamilton "Ham" Porter instructed that little shit who sucked at baseball and ruined Dennis Leary's Babe Ruth autographed ball on how to make a proper s'more. Then that douche asked Ham how he could have some more (s'more) if he had not had anything in the first place. Michael "Squints" Paladoris should have given that kid at least 3 bitch slaps.

No it is time for me to admit that I have a problem. Ever since I graduated from law school and did not get a job I have had alot of time on my hands. I have become obsessed (did I misspell that?) (Did I misspell mispell?) with bball shoes. I have bought 5 pairs and I can't even play bball until I get my orthotics in the mail (due to arrive in 3 weeks). For all those who dont know (the only person who reads this already knows this so this is kinda moot) I tore ligaments and catilage and broke a bone in my ankle last summer. Anyways, I can't stop buying these shoes but I swear to all of my readers that the Penny Foamposites will be my last 2 pairs. I bought a pair of the Nike Air Max Force (Aka the Barkley's or Fab Fives) last night. I had them when I was 12 and have wanted them again since them. Nike re-released them a week ago and I finally got them. YES!!! (See the pic above).

Hannukkah / Christmas gift advice time: I have no ideas at the time but wanted to give my thong of readers of what to expect in the upcoming installments of Blizz de la. We will figure it out ya'll. Please post all gift suggestions in the comments section and those worthy of publication will be mentioned in an ensuing volume of this blizz.

Try the pumpkin spice frapuccino from Starbucks and be sure to get the whipped cream on top. We give it a Thumbs up.

Lattes

Alright Meow

Thumbs Co. was closed for a teacher's work day and we apologize for the lengthy delay. We are very excited about New Years coming up. Who wouldnt want to live this day...Wake up at 11'ish, enjoy a delish business man's lunch @ Commander's Palace (25 cent martinis), after picking the car up from the valet and handing him / him a measley $2 heading to the Casinyes. After winning big and almost losing your voice from yelling "t t t t t t too too too t t t toooooo maaaaannnnnyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!! you will then head to the newly revamped Saks on Canal to buy all the True Relig's, Lacostes and other assorted hoity toity / snootery doo products that winnings can buy. Then of course we will send an insignificant intern to Sports Plus on Canal to see if they have received their shipment of Thumb's beloved Foamposite shoes (otherwise, Thumbs himself will have to camp out in front of their store on the night of January 1st to hook himself up when they come out on the 2nd). Then, we will realize that it is time to head back to the casinyes / I cannot believe we left in the first place / there is no way we are going to leave and go to Saks in the first place and we will try to run but realize that our lungs cannot handle that physical activity due to the massive amounts of cigarette smoke that our lungs inhaled while sitting in that human ashtray known as Harrah's (I'm not complaining, my skin / body can handle the smoke as long as I get to yell T T T T T T Tooooooooo Maaaaaaaannnnnnyyyyyyyyy!!!!!! for all the days). After I am forced to leave the casino due to the loyalest reader getting thrown out by Ping for requesting one more Miami Vice and then turning violent and attempting to kick over ask tray cans, slot machines and elderly gentlemen that are held upright by their Harrah's card stuck in the slot machine which is connected to their shirt pocket by a rubber curly-q lanyard with a clasp on the end we will head to the bars. Alright thats enough. I'm sick of writing about this.

Da Da Da Da Its Fantasy time. Crackle! has dropped into second. Damn that Pop! for taking my rightful position atop the world of all things fantasy bball. Pickups? Good question. I was going to say Marvin Williams of the Hawks but Veto This picked him up this morning. Hmmmm...Earl Watson could be solid pickup for someone in need of a PG (such as myself) as long as Ray Allen is out with a case of erectile dysfunction. Keep your head up Ray. It happens to the best of us and by us I mean nobody at Thumbs, Inc.

I have an easy recipe for all of those who cannot cook. Simply take an assortment of vegetables (cherry tomatoes, zuchinni, eggplant, asparagus, yellow squash, portabella muchrooms) and toss them in a bowl with kosher salt, fresh ground black pepper and balsamic vingarette and then lay them out on a baking sheet and roast them in the oven at 375 for 20-30 minutes or until tender.

Seacrest Out

This Guy!!!!!!!!!!!

Open wounds and bball shoes

My wounds appear to be healing nicely. See the pic above but disregard the salve that is spread in a thin layer over my open wounds. I know it looks painful but my PK's really know how to stop my brain from knowing that my arm is actually burnt to a crisp. Anyways, enough about my injuries / pain and suffering.

Lets move onto the subject of shoes. The nike Penny foamposites are coming out soon and Thumbs really wants 2 pairs. These are Thumbs, Inc's favorite shoes of all time and they are impossible to get. They only come out in DC/MD/VA/NYC and possibly Boston and SF. WTF Nike? Please let me relive the good old days of Mason Prep 8th grade bball. Sure, I was a little fat but that does not mean that I didnt put up 20+ points on Charleston Day, Porter-Gaud, First Baptist, James Island, etc, etc. Fat people can play too. After each game I would have a victory double cheeseburger, fries and banana split. Thanks mom.

The notorious Thumbs subsidiary, Crackle! is having a tough time this week playing our archnemesis Burn Rossie Burn. What a D head. That team is mocking the injuries that we here at Thumbs, Corp have obtained. F U Burn Rossie Burn aka Hausier Meat aka Yagshemesh. However, Crackle!'s best bud and other noise made by rice krispies when poured into milk, Snap! is not on Thumbs, LLC's shit list despite her / her coldblooded remarks concerning Thumbs' recent injuries. Fine, fine onto the fantasy bball pickups. Seeing how Charlie Bell, Bargnani, Sean May, Rudy Homosexual and some other guy I posted about have all been picked up I would say the only remaining player worth a S is Martell Webster of your Portland Trailblazers (he bombs 3's). I have to admit that I used to like the Blazers due to their roster of hoodlums and potsmokers. There wasn't a day that passed without one of those JailBlazers being detained at a airport security checkpoint for having grass / weed in their carry-on. Idiots / I love those guys. Thank you Damon Stoudamire, Rasheed Wallace and Reuben Patterson. Speaking of Reuben Patterson; Is he a ashkenazi Jew or what? Where does he get off having the name Reuben. That is my hebrew name. Did Reuben grow up in a family of Etheopian Jews? That is the only possible scenario that makes any sense whatsoever. Have a wonderful Shomer Shabbas this weekend Reuben. I hope you dont have any games b/c I think we both know you would have to sit out due to your strong beliefs against any work being done from sundown on friday until sundown on saturday. Enjoy your brisket and be sure to eat up so that your gandmother does not force all of the leftovers down your throat.

Sorry everyone, no recipes today. Thumbs has been a bit leery of going near the kitchen since "the incident." Lets not mention that again mkay. Here's hoping all of my readers / reader have wonderful / a wonderful days / day.

2nd Degree Burns Hurt

Sorry for not posting yesterday. I know I probably completely ruined more than 1 readers day but I have a good excuse. I got 2nd degree burns on my left arm thanks to some hot, hot oil. Dizzam that shit hurt. The 2 shots that I got in my ass at the emergency room hurt too. I have two band-aids on my keester to commemorate the incident. Dont worry, dont worry I have plenty of PK's to tide me over. Blizz + PK = some good writing. All the greats wrote their best material while doped up on something right? Exactly. The next few days of Thumbs should be pretty interesting / still not interesting.

Anyways, on to more interesting things. One subsidiary of Thumbs, Inc. Frozen Thumbs Arbuckle is in a free fall from first place in fantasy hockey. However, we here at Thumbs, LLC could not be happier that the team that will eventually overtake our namesake will be none other than KrAzY eYe. Thats right folks / folk KrAzY eYe is poised to topple a Thumbs, Corp team from its rightful place atop the world of fantasy sports. We thought we had an empire but remember, an empire it not built in a day. Or something like that. I cannot remember the exact quote.

Fantasy bball pickups? LaMarcus Aldridge is an interesting candidate. Thumbs had one of our interns research the history behind the "La" in LaMarcus' name and we were interested to find out that the "La" means "little" or "junior" so someone in LaMarcus' family was / is named Marcus and LaMarcus was named after him. From now on all of Thumbs, CPA fantasy teams will be given their name with the "La" in front of it to indicate that it is a new season of fantasy sports and that that specific team is a descendent of the team from the previous year. For instance, Crackle! will be LaCrackle! next year and LaLaCrackle! the year after that. Thumbs, Co claims property rights to the "La" prefix in all things fantasy related. H H H cough H H H Heyo, H H H H H H H H, H H H H.

Now my forearm is starting to hurt so i'll go take a nap and rest before I come back and sit in front of my computer for the rest of the day to research things such as fantasy bball / hockey, ebay, email and other assorted websites and of course post to this blizzle. Thanks for reading!

Stiffler's Mom

Stiffler's mom aka Janine Stiffler loves crab salads. How do I know this obscure fact? Funny that you ask. I know because I prepared her one crab salad to day at lunch. I made it extra large because she appeared to be a large woman on movies such as American Pie, American Pie II and American Pie III. Maybe she was in American Pie IV but I didnt see that one because the previews made the movie look like a dooshay. Lets not forget that her credits also include the following masterpieces: Legally Blonde, Legally Blonde II (as Paulette Bonafante) and Best in Show (and several other Christopher Guest movies). Anyways, I would have guessed she would weight a deuce, perhaps a deuce and a half but in actuality she appeared to weigh closer to 175. Not too bad Stiffler's mom. I'll be honest Stiffler's mom, I like you. You're cool. When I brought you your salad you asked me to taste the vegetarian chili that I made. I brought you a bowl. You liked it. Now I have to make you six gallons of soup since you asked me to. Dammit Stiffler's mom. That is going to take hours.

Ok now we all know what time it is. It's fantasy bball update time. Crackle! The current standings seem to indicate that Crackle!, formerly Oops I Crapped My Pants, is holding strong in 1st but is only 0.5 points in front of Pop! The third member of the Rice Krispies gang, this blizzle's loyalest / only reader, Snap! is gaining ground and has moved into 8th place. Snap!!!! Thumbs is glad to see this improvement. Here is who we here at Thumbs, Inc. would pick up if you needed a little gettyup in your fantasy bball step: Bargnani (he is getting minutes and will get you a few blocks, points and good %'s) and / or Dorrell Wright (he will get you a few steals, blocks, pts, rebounds and his FT % is solid). That's really it. The pickings are slim, i'll be honest. Earl Jones takes a plunge from 4th to 7th.

H H H Heyo. H H H H H H H, H H H H H H. H H H Heyo. H H H H H H H, H H H H H H H. Recipe time ya'll. Today we are making Peppermint Pie. This is a real crowd pleaser during this, the holiday season. Mkay, first make a crust: chocolate cookies ground up in a food processor and then mixed with 1/4 cup of sugar and enough melted butter to bind it all together. Press this mixture into a pie pan and bake at 350 for 10 minutes. On to the pie filling. Take 1 cup of crushed peppermints (the soft kind) and mix it with 1/4 cup of boiling water and 1 packet of plain flavored gelatin. Let this cool down and then add 1 cup of whipped cream. Next, fold 1/2 cup of whipped cream into this mixture. Pour the mint / gelatin / whipped cream mixture into your cooled pie crust. Let this set and then garnish with crushed peppermint. Peppermint Pie, its a good thing.

The blizz's Thumbs are now tired from all of this info. Look for more posts tommorow. I have much more to pass on to all of my readers / reader.

Body Pillows

Is it just me or is it impossible to sleep without one of these? Once you go body pillow you'll never go back. What's not to like? Cushioning from head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes? Check. Something soft to wrap your "off arm" around (all of you readers out there know the arm that you don't know what to do with when you are trying to fall asleep)? Check. Spooning partner pre-falling asleep style when you F-up and do something stupid to piss off that special lady / man friend with whom you would normally spoon by acting the fool? Check. Like I said earlier, what's not to like? Exactly.

Ok, ok I know all of our readers want some fantasy advice so here it goes: Luther Head and Smush Parker are still sitting on the free agent scrap heap. What is everyone waiting for? Rudy Homosexual is a solid pickup for those of you needing steals and blocks and can handle up and down games in the point and rebound categories. Finally, Charlie Bell is a personal favorite of mine and I might pick him up so all readers should probably pull the trigger ASAP.

Lattes

What the deuce?

Is it just me or is Dick Vitale absolutely unbearable to listen to? He is like centox nerve gas on my ears. They were on the verge of bleeding. I really wanted to watch the UNC - Ohio State game tonight but after the first five minutes and hearing Vitale yell "oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh baby he's unbelievable, he's on fire baby! He's a PTP'er, a diaper dandy! ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh!" or some other nonsense in a pitch that only dogs should be able to hear, I turned it off and watched Rachel Ray spend $40 or less on food in a day in Dallas. Now that's some shit. When Rachel Ray is more bearable than anyone then you know that person cold be the most annoying / obnoxious person that this blizzle has ever seen. Dick Vitale has diarrhea of the mouth. Dick Vitale is an SOB, POS and a diaper dandy and that diaper needs to have those sticky tabs connect at the back of his head so that the diaper (maybe a adult undergarment) is in position to protect all loyal viewers of ESPN / ABC college bball from Dick "Head" Vitale's diarrhea of the mouth. I hate that guy. What do all of the readers out there think about this? Feel free to post comments.

Finally I have a Blizz to call my own

Topics covered by this blizz will include but are not limited to the following: (1) fantasy sports, (2) food, (3) TV shows, (4) names for things that are considered gross, i.e. "darth vader" and "hot karl", (5) gaining weight, (6) losing hair.

Potential loyal readers here we go...I feel like i've got the gift, the gift of all things fantasy sports related except for football of course. So without further adieu I will hook all of you up with some tips on who to pick up in fantasy bball in the next few days. Obviously I won't mention anyone that I have my eye on but we (aka me) here at de la thumbs like to make our readers (aka nobody) feel like they are getting the best information possible so I will try to not hold out on all of you. I feel like Smush Parker is due to come out of his season long slump. Add him if you know whats good for your team. Also, R. Luther Head (the R is for his given first name, Richard) could be a hot commodity due to his 3 point prowess. Also, Anthony Parker is solid and should not be available although he kinda sucks.

de la thumbs has interests other than fantasy sports but we will be honest, those interests are neither interesting nor existant.

The staff here at de la thumbs created a great soup last night that we suggest everyone makes at home and we will call it white bean and mushroom soup. Here is the recipe: Saute thick cut bacon in a dutch oven (I know, i know) until it is crispy. Remove the bacon from the dutch oven and then saute a red onion (minced) in the bacon fat. Add pepper. Add mushrooms and cherry tomatoes and 4 cans of any white bean (canneloni?). Add more pepper and red pepper flakes. Now add chicken stock to cover everything and use a mashed potato masher to kinda mash up some of the beans. Let this come to a boil and then simmer it for a while (30 minutes at least) at the end add a little heavy cream just to add some body to the soup. Add the bacon back to the soup. Serve and enjoy. Delish! (optional: cut up and then cook some chorizo or andouille sausage in a separate pan and then add the sausage and rendered fat to the soup. Do this before adding the cream).

What is the deal with Meredith Grey? Why does she always repeat things like "I'm knitting?" or "I'm dating?" This is so f-ing annoying to the thumbs. She should start repeating things such as, "I'm f-ing irritating" or "I'm eating crap." Shut up Meredith Grey, you suck! While we are in deep conversation about this season's hottest thursday night sitcoms lets talk about Ugly Betty. What a show! Betty certainly lives up to her billing. She is certainly ugly but thumbs had braces while freezing his phalanges off in the land of women dressed in oversized ward burton t-shirts, all white velcro reeboks and perms with close cropped sides and back so he knows how ugly one can be when you have all those leftovers in your braces. Lets just say that I walked into class with vanilla crisp powerbar stuck in my ruberbands on more than once. Anyways, Ugly Betty really hit home in today's world of illegal immigrants in the US of A. Mr. Suarez (Betty's dad) is illegal and just got put on lock down by the local law enforcement. What a shame. Mr. Suarez has all the attributes that many legals have: a huge moustache and his penchant for wearing staple articles of clothing such as shirts and pants. However, what he does not have is any restraint when it comes to a table full of chimichangas, flan and arroz con pollo. Act the part Mr. Suarez, act the part.

Finally, in this, the initial installment of Blizz de la Thumbs Arbuckle, we would like to thank all of you for reading. Thank you, come again! Giggidy giggidy, giggidy goo.